Violence in America is a public health problem of the highest magnitude and while there are numerous programs, policies, and regulations to decrease violence, it is unlikely that any effort will be successful unless and until the family is restored to its rightful place in society. The family, unlike other institutions, is the centerpiece to a successful, progressive society and holds the ingredients to creating a violencefree environment.
The family is primary to our understanding the nature of violence and violent behaviors. Likening the family to a scientific petri dish is a useful metaphor for understanding the influence that parents have on their children. How children develop and grow into adulthood are a function of the cultural principles they observe in their parents’ behaviors.
However, families often provide the seeds for violence that is manifested in three specific ways: animal cruelty, child abuse and domestic violence. The family is a system, which means that violence in any part of the family equals violence in every part. Spousal abuse is a primary indicator of child abuse and vice versa. This system of family violence also suggests that we need to be aware of how the family pet or companion animal is treated as it may be a predictor of other forms of family abuse. Together, animal cruelty, child abuse and domestic violence formulate a Triangular Violence Design (TVD) which creates a breeding area for violence to spread as if it was a communicable disease or virus.
To deter violence in our families, there has been a proliferation of both public and private organizations created for the purpose of responding to abusive behaviors. Externally driven mental health programs and initiatives designed to provide immediate assistance, however, have had little impact on stopping the cycle of violence in our families and often portray family members as victims and passive participants. Viewed as helpless, parents are pictured as naïve and unsophisticated when it comes to child rearing practices, which only increases their state of dependence. Whether it’s the media providing unsolicited advice, advertisers trying to market unnecessary products or pop psychologists attempting to reform child rearing practices, parents are under siege.
Ironically, at a time when the role and value of parents are being undermined by public and private agencies, calls for greater parent accountability are on the increase. Furthermore, as parental training and education are being promoted by governmental agencies, numerous child advocacy groups and organizations are attempting to replace parental responsibilities with social services.
Although differences and similarities between traditional and alternative family life styles are often debated, there is no evidence that a family structure has any impact on the extent to which it is violent or violencefree. Rather, what is important are the values, beliefs, and attitudes taught by parents to their children. How family members interpret right from wrong, liberty from license, and respect from obedience, can be found in any family, regardless of its configuration. Parents have the opportunity to create a violencefree family for their children; a family where children have the freedom to explore and enrich their talents within an environment based on a respect for the rights of others. Through self-regulation and relationships based on mutually shared respect and support, parents can create a violencefree family culture that can help transform society. To change the dynamic, however, requires a determination that solutions to creating violencefree lie with parents and families.
Parents need to develop a broad-based network that identifies those internal behaviors that encourage and support a violencefree environment. Instead of focusing on family problems and deficits, parents with their children need to identify what’s right about their families and what’s working. Parents need to meet and talk together about what they do on a regular basis to create a violencefree family environment. Violencefree behaviors and practices need to be shared, publicized, and communicated at the family and community level. SWIVL can play a critical role in developing and facilitating this network. Other initiatives that SWIVL promotes to encourage parent self-awareness and create a violencefree environment include:
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Increase the role and responsibility of the family in the social and academic performance of their children
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Reduce government intervention at all levels in the social and academic performance of children
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Create new tax codes that encourage responsible, parental stewardship
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Impose severe felony punishments for parents that encourage, practice, and allow violence in their families
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Increase adoption incentives for parents
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Reduce the role of government in the interpersonal family affairs
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Encourage and promote a culture of success for all children
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Emphasize interventions that focus on the talents and strengths of families
